Hatred

Status of my mom : Shes quite sedated by the medication so she is mostly sleeping.

Me? Hubby and I are now discussing what are the future plans dealing with my mother... and all don't seem that bright because there are conflicting possible problems here and there, down in Perlis, Penang or KL but I am sure we will find a way..

My mood : I am feeling really low these days. Emotional in a way but I still have a son to take care of.. so well, focusing on my son when I am not focusing on my mother.. the only two people in my life at the moment that I really have to care for..

Hubby? Well.. hes got so much work to do and I feel really bad to trouble him with MY family matters.. when hes got his too to worry about. Moolahs aint coming in from my side now that I have decided to let my mother stay with me.. So Hubby will be the sole provider for the family and stressing him out won't be a good idea..

I have to hold back my intentions of working or studying now... and you know who I blame? Those that pressured my mother into her situation.. I don't think I really want to have anything to do with them now... Seriously, my hatred for them knows no boundaries. My mother cared and loved them and when she is in such a situation, no one tried to do anything nor tried to care for her.. all they could do is talk about it, laughed about it, get angry at her.. now, everybody is avoiding her.. so taking her down to KL is the best thing to do. she can cut all ties with them. SHIT I am turning into a bitter bitch..

I just hope that the doc diagnosed her realy quick so I can take her out of the ward and let her take her medication back home.. I don't want to leave her alone there no more.. it hurts me to be stuck in between.. its for the best I know but when it comes to really taking action, it hurts...