Right decisions?

So after 3 years of not seeing Jaden's opthamotologist, we went back again recently to check on his eye again. 

This time, the doctor said that he needs to have surgery on both his eyes and that freaked me out so bad.

Really? Is it a must?

He had this a sudden overnight turned in and I swear that it wasn't something he was born with. 

One can check back on all his photographs to date since birth to just before 4 years old and his both his eyes have always been normal looking. 

*sigh*

They took his weight and height, nevertheless, just in case I opt for surgery, which is likely the case but I am still very worried if I am making the right decision for him.

I dislike making decisions like these, these are the risks that I would not want to have any dealing with. It is not as if its a risk I take upon myself but for another being that I am responsible for. 

What if he does not want surgery? What if this and that pops up onto my mind but like the doctor said, its better to have it done when he is young right now compared to when he gets older. 

Should I? Should I not?

Once we settle down with all these moves, then I will really have to sit down and do more research before I give the green or red light to this surgery.

Jaden is currently weighing in at 23kg, which he has been weighing since the past 1-2 years, height is 124cm. 

I am also rather worried about his weight that has not shown any signs increment. Why is that so? Is his body not absorbing nutrients? Is it because of his leaky gut syndrome? 

See? I have so much on my mind, its really making me to look like some super paranoid mum.

People say, as long as they are healthy and happy, its fine. 

BUT what makes you think its healthy when we do not know for sure if its just the age (growth spurt slowing for a while) or is it really due to his body unable to absorb these nutrients to give him what he really needs to grow, both in weight and brain development?

It goes the same when it comes to Mason.

Am I making the right decision for him when I choose not to vaccinate him?

Is it wrong of me to hold back or delay when I clearly saw the difference between Jaden and Mason? 

Jaden had a really really bad case of ezcema and cradle cap since birth. The prolonged jaundice..

If only I knew back then about food sensitivity, IGg, IGe, what to avoid eating so the jaundice may reduce.. not to bathe him with Guiness (no thanks to the elderly people and their advice)...

What AEFI meant and how to look out for it since day 1 of vaccination. 

If only.. and that until now, has made me felt guilty towards the choices I made for Jaden last time and I want to make it different this time round with Mason. 

Already failed once, I need not fail twice unless its God's will but I will want to make it right for my children as much as I can or what I am capable of. 

If only.. it only they have these facebook mummy support groups that really do help a lot in terms of sharing experiences and advices, been there done that, seen that to see what results work best.

I was still very young at the time Jaden was born and my friends have yet become mummies, therefore I was quite alone when it comes to childcare.

These days, mummies are so well-informed that its good and bad at the same time, depending on the individual mummy that uses their knowledge to either help or shoot another one down. Human nature, the good and the ugly. 

Mason @ 5 months old

Mason had a checkup last Tuesday morning with his pediatrician. 

He was 9 days shy of turning 5 months old at the time of his checkup and he is weighing in at 7.23kg, 66cm in height.

Jaden was 7kg at 5 months old and only 7.41kg when he was 6 months old.

Seems like Mason is the heavier but shorter one? :)

One more month before solids! Can't wait yet I don't really want him to grow up.. In just a blink of an eye and he is already 5 months old! 

I have scheduled his first vaccination this coming 7th month but I am still unsure if my decision is right or wrong. Somehow I prefer not to if I could.. can I?

Stomach Flu

Last week was the worst week of my life thus far in 2014.

Don't read any further if you have food in your mouth or is planning to eat as this post will make your hurl!

First, it was Jaden who was down with diarrhea and he had it real bad. Well, I thought it was read bad until I had mine, which was 100% worse and I am glad it was me instead of him.

Last Friday night was when it all started and I suspect that it was because of the nasi kandar and papadom we had.

Jaden had the papadom and after that he sharted (fart+shit) and by night come, he blasted his whole diaper full until it overflowed out onto the floor. I was very embarrassed as it happened at my friend's house and she cleaned it up for us. I was very very sure she will never pick up my calls again but luckily, she still does. *phew* Thank you so much, you know who you are!

Then later that night around 3am, I rushed out of the room and puked every single grain of nasi kandar out and my whole body started trembling so bad.

The whole body was shaking, as though after I just gave birth. I could not control the shaking at all until I went into the bathroom and bathed myself with the water heater turned as hot as it can be.

By morning come, I was already parking myself in the toilet, doing porcelain runs and it was back-to-back episodes until I felt super dehydrated. I did not even had anything to eat at all that day. 

I was really scared that my breastmilk supply might just drop to zero, but luckily it did not.

I continued breastfeeding Mason as usual, but I made sure I kept myself cleaned up properly with lots of soap and scrubbing.

On Sunday morning, Hubby bought me 100 plus to help rehydrate my body which has lost so much fluid and sharts, too were happening every now and then. It was really tiring, embarassing and energy draining. I still had to attend to Mason's needs and Jaden. Luckily Hubby could handle more of Jaden for me. I definitely will faint if I were to take on the two boys totally on my own.

Porcelain runs went on still until about Wed morning, which I believe was the last run, after pooing foamy frothy looking poos. Farts were very very smelly and I stank up the whole house the night before with it. Smells worse than something dead!

So for the last two days, I have been eating just plain porridge with salted egg. That was it and drinking lots of yoghurt drinks, eating yoghurt and plain water. I dare not take any oily, fried or spicy food and I think I will be avoiding those for some time.

I did not go to the doctor although there were times I was really tempted too but after reading up on the net, there is nothing much the doc can do about the virus in the tummy. It is a virus after all and virus just don't get killed.. its how you maintain the body gut flora to help battle it and speaking of gut flora, its time to buy myself probiotics to take. 

Just today, I pooed semi-solids and I have never been happier to see solids. I am just praying that I am recovered from last week's nasty episode. An episode I don't want to have a re-run!